The Super mum – The Expectations – You know her the mum who works full time, makes vegan cupcakes in the shape of Unicorns, organises perfect birthday parties with clowns, petting zoo and every Disney princess available for hire. She has an immaculate home which on any day could grace the pages of Vogue Living. She eats Paleo, has a perfect smile, does Pilates and always looks like she just stepped out from the pages of a fashion magazine! Oh, how can the rest of us keep up? Or is it even a possibility?
Admittedly I was trying to live up to these expectations- running a business, shuttling my differently-abled teeny tiny between school, therapist appointments, doctors appointments, extracurricular activities, cooking meals for each member of our family with varying dietary needs and preferences, exercising, cleaning our home- the lot! I was feeling drained and overwhelmed with battling my little one’s chronic illness.
[I do apologise for the radio silence but I’m back and looking forward to chatting with all you ladies.]
What is being a Supermum to you?
It took me a while to understand that being a Supermum to me was quite simply putting my family first above all else. Whatever your story is – whether your child is living with a disability (like mine is), a single mum raising multiple children on your own or even a doggie mama- the greatest gift one can revel in is motherhood. Don’t let yourself be defined by anyone else’s definition but your own.
Being a Supermum to me meant prioritising time with my family and making all decisions with their interests in mind before my own. If this means putting down my phone and helping my daughter with some tracing to fine tune her motor skills that’s the Saturday morning spent and the joy we received when she traced her first letter was priceless. Those moments are irreplaceable. Being a Supermum to me also meant being the best me, happy, loving, calm and relaxed, able to listen, guide and encourage her. So how can we the best us for our children?
Organise a support system
Growing up in a single mum household I saw first hand what it took to juggle multiple hats of spending quality time with your children, putting food on the table and having some time for yourself.
Truthfully, my mum had a team of helpers, dedicated family members and capable employees. She ensured I was always surrounded by an amazing and loving support system and took the time to drop me off at school before she started her busy day. So while one may think that Supermums do it all on their own it is quite likely they have some form of assistance! You are probably thinking, does this make me unworthy of being a Supermum? Certainly not! It’s OK to ask for help, in fact, it is the best thing you can do for your family.
So let’s be frank complimentary help isn’t always available for everyone so how can we afford it? I found making small changes to my daily habits like packing a healthy picnic lunch instead of frequenting eateries. Perhaps buy preloved instead of brand new [some options in the links below or see this post] or cutting back on the number of glasses of Pinot Noir per week and substituting with the equally satisfying palette cleansing No. 1 Botanicals Rosemary Sparkling Water (I’m Obsessed!) – will free up some extra pennies to have that babysitter over for a night out and a little romance.
Don’t Neglect Yourself
It is easy as a mum to dedicate yourself completely to your family and forget to pamper yourself sporadically.
Getting every member of the family to develop their self-help skills will not only lead to independence but will also allow yourself some time to take care of your own well being so you can be better equipped to be their pillar of strength when they need it. As they say in event of an emergency landing the oxygen mask goes on you before you can attend to your child :).
Go on mama take that guilt-free weekend away you’ve been postponing for years, slap on that skin quenching mask and have that drink on balmy evenings under a jewel-strewn sky you totally deserve it! Recharge those Supermum batteries.
[Click on the product images for more info]